*kicks 5 girls out of mi bed*
Fuck yes, return of your favourite bloggist and blank-starer. Hey, hi, welcome back to watch the meteoric return of a washedup prosist. Reminder to wipe your feet on the way in, remove your overgarments, and in general just—fucking—relax. This will be a crude opening to a classy establogishment.
So there I was, 4 hot b*tches in my face, and six hours later I'm passed out on an air mattress with my boyff's sprawling legs nudged across my abdomen. Uh, fuck, I forgot that happened. But ignore that rather unfortunate detour.
Back to the Lovely Ladies. There was Alyssa with her black snake-hair in a bun, completely drooling over my shoulder while I occasionally threw her half-hearted glances. Heh. Erica was the most typically attractive: blonde and busty with big bulging green eyes. I probably eyefucked her the most that night. There was Marina, her dark brown hair annoyingly long and straight. I swear I almost stepped on it at some point. Then last—and very much least—was this Mexican chick who was learning English on the spot to try to fuck me. But she was hot though: very nice hip-to-waist ratio, if I do say so myself (*tips sombrero*).
And so there I was, overfilled cups in both hands, and I think I spilled my Sex on the Beach on the Mexichick's see-through tube top. Try holding two drinks while carrying 4 conversations at once. Not many guys can pull it off. Especially while this Alyssa chick kept nudging me in the love handles. Anywho, I told the 'fiery' Latina that I'd help her clean up the mess and personally check the damage myself if she were to follow me to the bathroom. Naturally, that caused a little bit of an uproar in the group, as the remaining trio could not stand the thought of my prolonged absence.
Most "men" would crumble in that situation. But of course, being the absolute fucking genius that I am, I thought up a brilliant solution on the spot. I asked the girls if they wanted to help me clean our foreign(?) friend up in a deserted bedroom upstairs. Needless to say, by the end of the night there was more than one stained blouse to discard. Teh. It was only my 3rd ever five-some too. So that's basically it. Oh, and the fifth girl—she came later in the night to give me a midnight snack so-to-speak.
Feel free to leave comments or selfies in ze comments, and as always: Fuck Donald Trump!!!
And so there I was, overfilled cups in both hands, and I think I spilled my Sex on the Beach on the Mexichick's see-through tube top. Try holding two drinks while carrying 4 conversations at once. Not many guys can pull it off. Especially while this Alyssa chick kept nudging me in the love handles. Anywho, I told the 'fiery' Latina that I'd help her clean up the mess and personally check the damage myself if she were to follow me to the bathroom. Naturally, that caused a little bit of an uproar in the group, as the remaining trio could not stand the thought of my prolonged absence.
Most "men" would crumble in that situation. But of course, being the absolute fucking genius that I am, I thought up a brilliant solution on the spot. I asked the girls if they wanted to help me clean our foreign(?) friend up in a deserted bedroom upstairs. Needless to say, by the end of the night there was more than one stained blouse to discard. Teh. It was only my 3rd ever five-some too. So that's basically it. Oh, and the fifth girl—she came later in the night to give me a midnight snack so-to-speak.
So that's it for now. Gonna try to make this Blogtopia pop off again. Many more stories, always 100% truthful, on deck. Like my first foray into BDSM with two reluctant New York socialites 😏😏😏😏😏
Feel free to leave comments or selfies in ze comments, and as always: Fuck Donald Trump!!!
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